Big Bro, Saiki-ku!
by May525
Summary: Kusuo is a teenage boy with supernatural powers, and a psychic. He can handle that. Mrs Saiki is pregnant. Her husband tries to convince their son it's not so bad. Clearly, he still thinks otherwise.(In which Saiki Kusuo is going to be a big brother.)
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own the Saiki K. series. This is just for fun. Also, written with the knowledge of seasons 1-2 of the anime. Hope ya' like!**

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I had heard crying in my parents room. It was loud and even clearer in my head, or so I thought. It made it hard for me to sleep so I had reluctantly teleported to my father and mother's room. The cry sounded like my father but clearly, it wasn't. It was coming from my mother's arms. What the hell. Since when did my mother's arms cry like a baby? Wait-

"Oh Ku, you came to check up on us? How nice!"

What. Suddenly my father jumped out from under the sheets, a ghostly expression on his face, my eyes widened. I couldn't hear him, and gross. This must be a dream, a Precognition? No, I'd be too far into the future even if what I think is happening will happen. Saiki Kuniharu started to crawl over to his son, like a deformed spider drooling over numb thoughts, he latched on to his prey's leg. Again, gross, get away from me.

"Kusuo! Please use your powers to stop Kuki from crying! Please I beg you!"

No. Get away. And Kuki? If that's the name of the thing in mom's arms, that's just sad. It sounded exactly like the word kooky. And don't we have enough K's in this house already? Jeez. Maybe I just needed to stop thinking about this, I already feel a head ache coming up.

"Ku-chan!"

And so this is when I decided to wake up. Back in my bed, with a serious head ache. A precognition, great. But what exactly was it about?

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Turns out it wasn't long before I figured it out. Or, more specifically, my parents. It was hard not to notice their constant chanting during dinner. Of course only I could hear since they said nothing out loud. Still, make it stop.

"_I'm pregnant~I'm pregnant! Ku~ your mommy's pregnant! Just don't let your daddy know~okay sweetie_?"

She wouldn't stop, neither would my dad. They both thought the other didn't know, it was ridiculous. And so I took my dinner to my room.

"_Oh my darling wife, pregnant once again with a beautiful baby! I wonder when she'll tell me_~"

And so my life as the single child would end. Maybe even my sanity.

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Now you may be wondering how I coped with this situation. I didn't, I just avoided my parents like the plague. Especially my mother. She had the unborn thing in her stomach after all. It didn't have any thoughts and if I stared long enough I could see it's little limbs and underdeveloped looking movements, thanks to my X-RAY vision. I felt sick just thinking about it. And 'it' would only grow to be a child, which only made things worse.

"How odd it looks like you're already nine months! Have you been over eating honey? Also, where's Kusuo?"

And the worst part, everything. My parents wouldn't stop bothering me about it. Luckily my classmates didn't know. That's one good thing.

"Saiki-ku~ don't you want to listen to your new sibling's first hiccups?"

No. I want nothing to do with a fetus, baby, or any children. So why would my parents do this to me? They knew how I am. So did they secretly hate me or something? Maybe I'm just overreacting.

My mother's eyes started to swell with tears as she covered her mouth with a delicate looking hand. She sniffed as tears started to stream down her soft cheeks. Kuniharu tried to comfort his wife in his son's absence, but it didn't seem to work. Their thoughts were so loud I didn't even need to cross my eyes to know what was happening.

"A-all I wanted was a baby girl-"

"Or boy."

"to take care o-of and hold. To be able to cuddle with without making them feel uncomfortable... "

"You'll always have me darling."

"T-to have a child in my arms again. A-and now, my little Ku hates me because of my selfish desires!"

She sobbed into her hands. My father hugging her and rubbing her back. Feeling guilty for making my mother feel this way I couldn't help but teleport into the room. Looking away from the said woman, not because of guilt but because of the, baby, in her stomach was moving. A dark expression formed on her face. Oh boy.

She flipped the kitchen table, elbowing my dad's face in the process. Ouch.

"Ku come listen to your unborn baby sibling's adorable hiccups now!"

I had made a mistake, and I couldn't simply teleport away for another two minutes and fifty two seconds. Even if I did my mother would probably be upset for weeks. Crap.

And so I was forced to put my ear on my mom's stomach, awkwardly bent, listening to swishing sounds. This was too weird and uncomfortable.

It's only been a week damit.

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Please review :)


	2. Chapter 2

On the third week, my parents are already brainstorming names in the living room. At this point I've given up on staying at least three kilometers away when I don't need to eat, drink, sleep, or in general be a decent human being. Now it's five.

"Haruto! Kiki, Sai... Sakura! Wait no too overused in the fandoms..."

"Maybe something that'll match Ku's name~! Something cute!" My mom claps her hands together with a warm smile. Imagining me and a baby with my face posed together in sailer outfits, a wave of sea water splashing behind us and slight smiles on our faces. The pearly white boat marked with pink glittery letters on the side 'The Ku Ship 4 2' with Mommy&Daddy written in smaller letters under the glittery mess. My dad apparently being the mermaid in front. Why this is the imagery my mother thinks of I'll never know. It could be believable, just not the parts with me in it.

"Not just cute my darling. Adorable! The best of the best!" The man stood with one foot on the short table, glasses reflecting bright light for a moment as his finger pushes up his glasses. His pose in no way cool, yet all the more confident and sure of himself. A smile on his face. "How about, Shoe! Or Shoeko?"

My mother kept her folded hands and sweet expression, until She became my father's night terrors. A dark mood radiated from her skin.

"You want to name our future child after footwear you bassturd!?"

And so my sleepless night began.

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Saiki Kurumi is giving birth. Which shouldn't be happening, at this time anyway. I stare at my mother, and what am I supposed to do? A man knocks down the house door, it's broken now. Splinters fly everywhere. What a mess.

"I am here!"

His hair is messy and blown into what seems to be the shape of a fat V. Yup, that's how hard he kicked the door. I could only hope this wouldn't become his new hairdo. There's a suitcase brought from work in his hand, he throws it across the room and runs twords my mother. His thoughts are a mess, too. And he's my father in case you haven't figured it out yet. It's only been four months since the beginning of the baby's development. So again, this shouldn't be happening.

My mom panics, dad panics. And yes, I panic, just not as much as they do.

"Hospital! Car! Wait no. Kusuo go without me! Take mother baby!"

I take the mother baby and teleport to the hospital. She yells for a doctor and I hold her steady. A buff nurse is ordered to take her, he looks proud to be there and carries her off to a doctor._ I knew training all those brutal years was worth it_! And that's that. I don't even bother to touch the flash backs. I'm in the waiting room now, staring at the public fish bowl. I don't care much for fish, especially this one. Not exactly sure why. The old lady sitting a few feet away doesn't help. She won't stop thinking about my 'cute and young' cheeks. And how it was to be a young couple. No, my mother just looks young, calm down old lady.

_Blub, oh, human. Hey buddy~_!

I really don't like that fish. So I stare at the Sucker fish sucking on the glass instead. What I do understand is just sad. It wiggles and moves it's lips as if actually talking.

_I'm so hungry! Yuck, I just ate crap! Where's the real food_!?

Not like I can or will do anything about it. It's a fish. Heck I don't think I'm supposed to be able to understand their little brains. Fifteen minutes later my father kicks the door open. Luckily the door isn't wood but some other reinforced material that doesn't shatter easily.

"Kusuo! Why didn't you come back for your father!?"

Woops.

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There are few things that scare me. One of which are things I don't know about or understand, surprises especially. Do to my psychic abilities it's hard to find things like that. Which is why it's rare for me to suddenly have something cupping my shoulder, without me knowing who or what the thing is.

It's most likely not human, I can't hear their thoughts. It's probably a threat, why else would the hold be so firm?

I prepare to attack, eyes glowing with supernatural power.

"Hey best buddy! Didn't expect you to be here at the hospital! What a coincidinky!"

It's probably a monster, but not a current threat. So I relax a bit, eyes turning normal. My parents are busy chatting with the doctor. And yes, I'm staying too. Any decent son would. Or so my parents claim.

He continues to yell. Get away already, can't he see I'm busy ignoring him?

"Oh wow, guess fate brought us together, huh! Why are you at the hospital anyway? Hey buddy you hurt or something?"

This is my life, and that's Nendo, friendly but not my buddy. And no I'm not hurt, but I'm not fine either. My parents are just about done and he has to leave before then. Otherwise I'll have to deal with a whole lot of people wishing me luck on my future big brother hood. And well, you get the point.

"Why am I here? Oh well, my neighbor, Grampa Toto isn't feeling too well so I thought I'd come and visit to keep him company!"

Great, that's nice. Now leave.

"Oh hey! Maybe you could come with if you're not too busy! And if you are I understand if you don't want to talk about it." He puts a hand on my shoulder and grins in support, though his face doesn't change it's natural creepiness. It would've look super creepy if not for his genuine emotions showing through. "I'm here for you buddy, so if you ever feel like tell'in someone something. You can count on me, bestie!"

It's touching really. But I still need you to leave. Right now. Luckily that's what happens.

"Welp that's all. I gotta go I guess." He pats my shoulder twice before letting go. He walks away waving. My parents come in and Nendo decides to tell me one last time he's here for me from the doorway before leaving. My parents tell me the labor was a false alarm. Not like I didn't hear them think it first. I'm a bit surprised nothing wild happened. Like, say, needing to find a way to teleport Nendo somewhere high before he met my parents. The author's probably too lazy to write it down.

"Who was that anyway? It looked like he knew you Kusuo."

I just want to go home.

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Thank you all for reading! And for the reviews, favs, follows. Especially the reviews. Untill next time, probably.

Extra/Omake

Tittle: New Years

It was a dark night. Not a cloud in the sky. A cold breeze blew past. My mother and father nowhere to be seen. It was quite. If it weren't for the whispers and giggles around me. Something wasn't right. Even with all these sounds, crickets, people, music.

It was too quiet.

A light shoots to the sky, expanding with a loud pop. More follow soon after. Fireworks of all different colors decorate the night sky. The stars look small in comparison. A man whistles. I can't hear his thoughts. A woman gasps and a child giggles, I can't hear their thoughts either.

A disaster? Time travel? Did I teleport in my sleep? A skewer is in-between my fingers, half of the substance gone. I can taste the leftover sweetness on my tongue.

A weight slams into my back. What the hell. Loud whistles reaches my ears as another round of fireworks are shot into the sky.

"Big bro Saiki-ku! I found big bro Ku-ku!"

I can barely hear it, a child of some sort. Big bro? I turn to look back-

And open my blood shot eyes. A giant headache punching my brain. Good grief, it hurts. Sitting up I massage my temples. Another precognition, great. This time even farther into the future. But where was the disaster? I lay back down, covering myself in my blanket. A nap should do the trick. I'll figure it out later.

"Ku you'll be late for school if you sleep in! Are you not feeling well sweetie?"

Or not.


End file.
